The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Isekai by Sakka Keihan

Author:Sakka Keihan [SAKKA KEIHAN]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: J-Novel Club
Published: 2020-04-14T00:00:00+00:00

“I’m growing coffee here. No stealing. (^_^)

If you do, I’ll have to punish you. \(o_o)/

— the Coffee Farmer”

The writing was friendly enough, but the bloodstains splashed below it were anything but. The trench around me was filled with corpses. And seriously, emoji? On something like that? I had a really bad feeling about this.

Beads of cold sweat (again, metaphorical sweat) were dripping down my back.

I felt a piercing gaze from afar and spun around to meet it. I spotted something floating in the sky.

I pulled out the opera glasses for a closer look. A child with a stern air beyond his years was pointing a gun at me. He looked unhappy, like he was being forced to do something he didn’t want to. But the little jerk still went ahead and did it.

This is a world of fantasy! What are guns doing here?! I saw a burst of light form at its muzzle. It was a magic circle, surely forming something to launch at me.

But I’m a piglet. What we lack in combat power, we make up for in evasion. I took off running. Even though I wasn’t sure how much good it would do me, with presumably a trained sniper firing some sort of magical burst at me.

Run, run, run!

Find a stump!

I don’t want to die!

I still have a couple dozen books I need to finish! Wait until I get back to Japan and polish them off! And I want one last trip up to Hokkaido! One last meal of ikura!

When their life is flashing before their eyes, humans—er, boars—get one last burst of strength they never knew they had.

A shell launched forth from the magical circle. All told, I probably had less than a second to react. But that was enough for me to fish my key out of my pocket.

Stump! Gimme a stump!

These glistening eyes of mine (with colored contacts in) didn’t lead me astray. I made a sliding dive for the burnt remains of a tree.

Light flashed around me even before I heard the explosion. I slammed the door of my safehouse shut behind me, but even that wasn’t enough to protect me from the shock. As I huddled on the floor, the blast washed over me. I covered my ears and clamped my eyelids shut. Rubble fell on my head, but I knew I was safer suffering the scrapes and scratches than standing back up. All I could do was wait for it to be over.

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